The first step

I was deceived by the situation. I am still caught up with this denial stage. From all the things that I used to believe in “the Price,” it just downed on me that I took things way too carelessly. There might have been workers, but they are safe now. Thanks to Timmy and my unselfish desire to give way, that I also gave way to a step that I’ll regret for the rest of my life.

In truth, I did shut him off. Not really. Maybe the best word for that should be… offering him the other option. And that is pushing him to his limit. Making it more complicated than I thought would make the best out of everything. But it just makes things worse.

I just couldn’t help myself from feeling this way. Regrets, and the Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda. The denial stage was indeed eating me alive. But little by little, I am getting tired of this feeling.

After all the things that happened, I think it’s the best time to let everything go. It’s senseless and useless to be stagnant. It makes me feel like I’ve been mopping around for almost eternity and the people around me has already surrendered from cheering me up.

I miss my old life. On how I used to be okay, and just contented. And the sudden change of the tide. I have been mourning for a year and it didn’t do me any good, so I am planning on some things worth thinking through.

I haven't heard from the STALKER/CHERUB for quite some time. Will i ever hear

news from him, ever again?